When I was a child, I experienced something painful. Literally painful. I was having chest pains, with difficulty breathing. I felt tingling in my fingers, sometimes I would feel sweaty or chilly. It happened at odd times, with no real cause, and I never knew when it was going to happen.
Of course, I told my parents. Honestly, they didn't believe me. Even when it eventually happened in front of them, they thought I was faking. But, it kept happening, and I remember my mom at one point telling me they were going to waste money to take me to the doctor so he could tell me it wasn't happening.
A few weeks later, I was seen by a doctor. He ran a few tests and told my parents that he thought I was just under physical stress, caused by eating too much, and not getting enough sleep. Mind you, I got more sleep than most of my peers, thanks to my extremely early bedtime, and I was skinny and always hungry.
My parents immediately cut my food back even more, and began requiring an earlier bedtime. It didn't help at all.
In the same period that this was happening, I was going through a period of strong dissonance. I was feeling really out of place, and so many things were starting to feel wrong.
Thankfully, the chest pain and difficulty breathing slowly got farther between episodes. Now, with the benefit of hindsight, I am aware that what I was experiencing were the symptoms of panic attacks. they were really scary.
Thankfully, the chest pain and difficulty breathing slowly got farther between episodes. Now, with the benefit of hindsight, I am aware that what I was experiencing were the symptoms of panic attacks. they were really scary.
I still have panic attacks sometimes. Usually centered around something scary to me. For example, during my time in the Army Reserve, I sometimes had panic attacks before drills in which I knew I was going to have to go into locker rooms.
Panic attacks are scary. If you experience them, I can't begin to encourage you enough to seek aomeone to help.
I struggled with panic attacks just like you growing up. I remember in Junior High being assigned a seat in science class in the very back of the room, right behind a girl named Michelle who had beaten me up a year or so before. I was terrified of her and my heart started racing, i had chest pains and I felt super short of breath. I thought I was going to have a heart attack but was too afraid to say anything, as I thought everyone would know I was petrified of sitting behind a girl whom the whole school knew had beaten me up. That whole semester I couldn't concentrate because I felt such anxiety and PTSD from being near her. and my grades were horrible. Worst of all I couldn't tell my parents as I didn't want them to know their son was physically afraid of a girl. -Dani
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