This is the first of a series of letters I sent my parents after I came out to them.
Dad and Mom,
I hope you are well. Me? I’m well.
I wanted to try to tell you a little bit about me, and
explain a few things, in the hope it will lead to greater understanding. I believe we need to have these
conversations, even if they make us uncomfortable. It is important to
understand, and it can be difficult to understand and believe what seems
different. Accordingly, I ask you to put aside what you believe you believe and put aside what you think you know and listen to my words. Allow what I am
saying to speak to you because this is the truth. I don’t refer to some lofty,
abstract truth someone talks about in an hour-long sermon, but rather truth I
personally experience firsthand.
I know you have a religious basis for your reaction to what
we’ve told you. I understand where you’re coming from. I’ve talked to literally thousands of Christians, and I know the basis behind the issues. I know
you’re not trying to be mean, and I know you’re acting out of fear and concern.
I know this concern is distressing for you, and I hope I can ease that concern
through these letters.
I wanted to tell you that Christians who insist the Bible
says transgender people are sinners or are hated by God or are going to hell are mistaken. It’s just plain not in there. At all. Not one single verse speaks
against me as a person, or as a child of God. Many of these Christians are
simply repeating what they’ve heard said by others. Some of them are acting out
of fear. Some of them are acting out of hate. Most of them are simply doing
what people do, and thus reacting negatively to anything different than them.
But the reality is this: the people in the Bible who are gender-non-conforming
(not being who their sex says they are supposed to be) are not horrible people
at all. In fact, one of the first persons recorded in scripture as becoming a
follower of Christ after His resurrection was a eunuch – a gender
non-conforming person.
There is a very common argument used by Christians to speak
against transgender people. This argument can be summed up in this manner: “The
Bible says God only made men and women. Not transgender people”. Yet, here we
are. For that matter, most transgender people are still either men or women.
But this isn’t really the point. Does the Bible really say God ONLY made men
and separately, women? Actually, no. Genesis says God created people male and
female. It does NOT say God created them male OR female. It says “and”, not
“or”. When a person buys groceries, the bagger asks “paper or plastic?” in
order to determine which of the two types of bags you’d like to get. You get
paper, or you get plastic. If they asked “paper and plastic?” It’d be odd
seeming, but you’d also get bags made out of both paper and plastic. Does this
make sense? Imagine an emergency where someone calls for the police and the
paramedics, and only one or the other showed up. When someone calls for the
police and the paramedics, they don’t expect to get only police cars or
ambulances. They expect to get both. Furthermore, some police officers are also
paramedics.
God created light and darkness in Genesis. Genesis says
light and darkness are separate, but then, we can easily see they are often
mixed together. Hence, the dim light of dawn or a gloomy library in an old
house, not to mention dusk, dawn, and twilight. Let’s not forget the dim light
in the corner of the room in the morning or evening. God created land and seas,
and scripture says they are separate, in Genesis. Yet, there are marshes along
the coasts, where the land and the water are mixed together, as well as bogs
and swamps, etc. totaling millions of acres in the USA alone. Freshwater and
saltwater are separate, created by God to be this way, right? Genesis says
so. He even made aquatic life that lives
exclusively in one or the other. Yet, estuaries along major river outlets are a
curious mixture of saltwater and freshwater, and there is aquatic life thriving
there. There are entire seas of mixed salt and freshwater, and we shouldn’t
forget the massive Hudson Bay. There are “freshwater” lakes just salty enough for
saltwater fish to thrive there. It’s light AND darkness, not light OR
darkness. It’s land AND water, not land OR water. It’s saltwater AND freshwater, not saltwater OR fresh water. They are combined, despite what many
Christians believe Genesis says. People are the same way. All of us – every
single one of us – is in some way a combination. The presence of the word “and” in Genesis is
vital and telling. It’s male AND female, not male OR female. God made all these
things as opposites, yet He also made them in such a way that they can, and do,
blend together into all sorts of combinations.
Transgender people have been present throughout recorded
history. It’s nothing new, and it isn’t a “modern-day epidemic”. There were
transgender people in all periods of history. Some cultures have had some sort
of third gender for centuries. The Hebrew culture, on which scripture is based,
actually has six different genders in their ancient writings, the Talmud and
the Mishnah (also sometimes called the
Mishna) as well as in dozens of other historical Hebrew texts. There were
transgender people around you in your youth too. You just probably didn’t know
it. It was much more carefully hidden if nothing else because someone known to
be transgender would have been treated in a manner that was beyond hideous.
Some amazingly well-known people in years past were
transgender, including Wilmer Broadnax, lead singer of the Golden Echoes, a
well known Christian quartet in the late ’50s and early ’60s, and of the Five
Blind Boys of Mississippi, a Gospel group in the later 1960s. Another
interesting example is jazz musician Billy Tipton, who was transgender. More
modern examples include actress Nicole Mains, writer/director Jake Graf, author
April Daniels, pop singer Kim Petras, Model Hunter Schafer, actor Elliot Page, and actresses Michelle Hendley and Jazz Jennings. Generally, surveys estimate the
current number of transgender people in the United States to be somewhere
between 1.5 million and 3 million people. Million. Yes, I mean million. That’s
more than the combined populations of Wyoming, North Dakota, Alaska, and
Vermont with ALL U.S. Territories included. In fact, there are 17 States with
fewer people in them, than the current number of transgender people in the United States. In other words, it’s not a fad, it’s not something dreamed up,
and it’s not something new. It’s more people than the number of Hebrews Moses led out of
Egypt. It’s a massive number of people whose lives are much harder than they
needed to be, because of how they are treated. I’m one of them.
Transgender people are just people. We’re no different as
people than anyone else. We are, however, patriots. Studies show transgender
people are twice as likely to serve in the U.S. Military than are other people.
We have hopes, goals, and dreams just like everyone else. We have skills, and
hobbies. For example, did you know I’m a very good photographer? We are
contributing members of society, being factory workers, cops, nurses, managers,
firefighters, writers, scientists, soldiers, teachers, artists and so much
more.
Christians as a group tend to think transgender people are
horribly confused. In fact, the term “people who are confused about their
gender” is often used in church circles to refer to transgender people, I
suppose because it seems nicer as Christians to say such a thing. The reality
is, we aren’t confused at all. We know exactly who we are. Another argument
used by Christian leaders is that transgender people are rebelling against
God’s authority. This is a leap of logic not remotely supported either in
scripture or in the lives of transgender people, but goodness does it sound
awesome as part of a sermon! If it is assumed that God, in His authority,
created a man and a woman, why in the world would God, in His authority, not be
able to create something more in the middle? I seriously doubt His authority is
limited. I submit that insisting God only created certain types of people is an
attempt by mankind to put limits on the power and authority of God. Who are we as people to assume God only does
what people want or are comfortable with!
Honestly, there’s no scripture saying God hates me. There’s
no scripture saying I’m an abomination. There’s no scripture saying I’m going
to hell. There is no scripture that says being transgender is a sin. There IS,
however, John 3:16 which says “whosever believes in Him will not perish, but
have everlasting life”. Then there is Matthew 7 which says “Judge not, or you
will be judged”, and James Chapter 4 which asks “Who do you think yourself to
be, that you judge your neighbor?”. There is Galatians 3 which says none of us
is different than any other of us; we are all the same. There is Romans 10 which
says the same Lord is free to all who call upon Him. Free to all. ALL.
Christians have taught for many years that various groups were not loved by
God, didn’t have rights, and were somehow “less than”, others. They’ve used the
same arguments over and over through the years to limit women, to stomp down
black people, to stomp down Irish people, to condemn interracial marriages, to
condemn gay people, and now, to condemn transgender people. Yet Jesus tells us
in Matthew 7 to focus on the plank in our own eye, rather than search for the
speck of sawdust in someone else’s eye. Despite this, instead of seeing a child
of God, they see someone who isn’t exactly like them, and they react by calling
these people sinful. Calling someone sinful allows the person to be comfortable
treating them badly, and even feel they are doing right to do it. I find no
place in scripture where Jesus acted this way.
Christian comedian Mark Lowry laments that Gentile
Christians are literally the uninvited guests at the wedding supper (the
wedding supper being an analogy for entering into His Kingdom), only being
allowed in because His own (the Hebrews) did not receive Him, and though we
were the uninvited guests that were let in, now so many of us are standing at
the door trying to keep other uninvited guests out. Who are we as Christians to
think we can decide who should be let in? How sad!
Thank you for reading this. It is my hope some of your concern
has been allayed. I love you.
